An unholy alliance 'twixt Cheeto and donut

I am an enthusiast for innovation -- new technologies, new products, and new ways of doing things. But I'm only a proponent of technology when it's in the hands of people who intend to use it to do good.

But not every innovation is a good thing. To wit: I bring you the "Flamin' Hot Cheeto doughnut", the product of an overactive imagination at a place called The Donut Conspiracy in Grand Rapids, Michigan.

The monsters! You can't put Velveeta on a doughnut without angering the gods! When the Earth splits open and the horsemen come, we'll know who to blame for initiating the Apocalypse.

All kidding aside, there's no flamin' way you could ever persuade me to try this thing. I have a very high tolerance for trying new things (psychologists say this openness to experience is one of the "Big Five" factors that define a personality), but a cheese-based doughnut is a step too far even for me.

Cheese belongs on blintzes, bagels, and certain Danishes served on Easter Sunday. But I will forever stand my ground that the One True Doughnut is a vanilla creme-filled, and the farther any "doughnut" strays from that model, the greater the penance its creator should be forced to do.

Brian Gongol

Brian Gongol

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